Afoot


There is a green plaster on my balcony
that wasn’t there before.

And last night there was a freak hailstorm
that earlier wasn’t predicted.

In my neighbourhood,
strange things are happening.

by Rebecca L. Atherton

~

If this poem has stirred things up for you or made you realise there are things in your life you would like to resolve, please feel free to visit my contact page or email me me to discuss both these things and the possibility of our working together in the future to accomplish these things.

Or, to book an appointment directly, see my contact page.

To be healed is having an awareness that you were never broken

To keep up to date with my progress and receive love and light in your inbox, send me your email address.

• Ask me a question or book an appointment
Buy remedies, healing aides and helpful accessories
• Check out my Etsy shop Lemon Rose Petals 🍋 to see what else I do

Throughout Spain it is Three Kings Day, a day as special as Christmas and celebrated with as much pomp and flair. So last night while the parade was taking place outside, I sat myself down in my sacred space and slipped into meditation travelling to Bethlehem to pay my own respects to the baby Jesus. Kneeling before the manger, I felt three hands: upon my shoulder, on my head and at the small of my back, belonging to the Three Magi: Melchior, Caspar and Balthazar. They informed me that I too had three gifts and as I stared into their eyes each took my hand, placing something in its centre.

🐚

The first gift was a beautiful shell: iridescent, intricate and delicate, to reconnect me to the flow of my emotions so that I could listen to them more deeply and so set them free. It was also to remind me of my original self, the part of me that comes from the water and to return me to my true family, the whale and the dolphin.

👸🏽

The second gift was two chess pieces, simple carvings made from wood or bone. The pawn to symbolise sacrifice, being part of a longer game and belonging to the people. The queen to symbolise empowerment, competence and capability, awakening to oneself and service to the Creator.

🔮

The third gift is a handheld mirror: silver, decorative and old; it’s purpose, to show me my true self and to allow me to see the true self in others so that I can more easily help them as well as tell who means me well and who means me ill.

🙏🏻

Afterwards, I felt incredibly peaceful, as well as supported and safe. These were special gifts, each with a profound and pertinent message.

I decided that in order to keep their message close by me all of the year and to really make the most of it, I would find a physical token for each and add them to my altar.

I would welcome donations from anyone who has a physical object like my gifts and gladly give a free reading in return.

🙌🏻

If this post has stirred things up for you or made you realise there are things in your life you would like to resolve, please feel free to visit my contact page or email me me to discuss both these things and the possibility of our working together in the future to accomplish these things.

Or, to book an appointment directly, see my contact page.

img_0136

To be healed is having an awareness that you were never broken

To keep up to date with my progress and receive love and light in your inbox, send me your email address.

• Ask me a question or book an appointment
Buy remedies, healing aides and helpful accessories
• Check out my Etsy shop Lemon Rose Petals 🍋 to see what else I do

The King Of Swords

image
INTRODUCTION:

This is a one-card reading with the pulled card representing the present. The decks used are the Original Rider Waite and the Sharman-Caselli. I chose to use both decks because one is a little more modern and the images clearer to see. At times I struggle with the vintage-ness of the Rider Waite, for while the illustrations are timeless, the details can be hard to make out.

~

OVERVIEW:

The Suit of Swords is all about the intellect and is associated with our thoughts and mind; in essence, our mental pursuits and how we navigate from here. It can also be about action, power, force, battle, ambition, challenge and control.

The King, when pulled on its own, is a warning or a calling to centre – bringing our awareness to a situation or an area of our lives where we are either being too or not swordlike * enough.

The king asks us to look inside and to query:

• Are we letting emotion cloud our judgement?
• Or are we shutting feeling and sensitivity out?

The King of Swords – also known as the King of Winter and the King of Air – brings all of this to our awareness, encouraging us to take a subjective look at both our story and our surrounding landscape so that we might learn to see new and different angles, accommodating all parties and trying on their shoes. If we are too caught up in our head; if we are disengaged and dispassionate; if we are focused only on looking sensibly and acting rationally, etc… we are looking and acting without involving our better parts or our highest selves. The King of Swords asks that we bring all of our parts into play, allowing each one a vote.

• What does your heart want?
• What does your spirit want?
• How about your gut?

To make it simpler, go through each chakra in turn, scanning for blockages, disparities or imbalances:

• earth star – 6 inches below your feet
• root
• sacral
• solar plexus
• heart
• throat
• third eye
• crown
• soul star – 18 inches above your head

Pay attention to all that comes up, then allow this information to guide you. The key, essentially, is to do the opposite of what you are doing now. So if you are already fully present, all possible appendages in: assess if perhaps you are being overly passionate, energetically messy, irresponsible, dramatic, needy, selfish or childlike? If so, pull back. Try to slow down, take a breath and think before you act. Try counting to ten. Look for what is missing. Seek out the discrepencies and add more of that. On the other hand: if you are cold and detached, sitting in your kingdom and looking down from way up high, from the priviledge and security of your castle – seek to soften and remedy that, allowing yourself to exit and wander in the garden awhile.

The King of Swords does not call upon you to be unfair; simply just. If there is a person who is disappointing or disrespecting you, or a situation that is no longer serving your highest good: the King asks that you be your own mentor and protector and battle it out. If you feel unable to do this, perhaps find a teacher or a counsellor to help?

* Swordlike: ambitious, intellectual, righteous, immobile, ruthless, courageous, forceful, aggressive, sharp, pointed, blunt, cold, detached, socially dysfunctional/inept.

*

IN-DEPTH ANALYSIS:

So who is this King that sits before us? Asking this question is perhaps the best way to get to know him and the easiest way to unpack his insight and wisdom so that we can learn what he has to say.
First off: he is serious. In the Rider Waite version, I would go as far as to say sad, burdened, worried, concerned, pained, suffering, shouldering much, struggling under the weight of considerable responsibility… And I’m not sure he likes his sword: look at how he is holding it, with such reluctance and disgust; and his hand – right, slightly bent – indicates it is far too heavy to keep balanced for long. I sense that it has been used recently to draw blood, inflict punishment or take life and it is this that has made the King unhappy. He is human. He feels bad. He knows he had to, or thinks that he did. It made sense at the time. He was defending his kingdom… But now, afterwards, alone with his thoughts and the full responsibility, he is besieged by guilt and remorse. The ‘trampled’ were people. In another life, some could even have been his friends.

• Is it right to step over another in order to achieve one’s own end?
• Is personal gain, or gain for one’s kingdom, one’s family, enough justification
   for aggression, violence and force?

Sometimes, yes. Sometimes, no. I’m not sure yet which situation we are looking at here.

And yet there is also an air of peace about him, shown in the Sharman-Caselli deck. This King is bigger, stronger. He wears a slight smile. His sword is clasped eagerly and lovingly, held with ease. In this case, it is not a burden; more a symbol – like a magician’s wand or a businessman’s phone. He looks comfortable on his throne, cushioned and supported by pillows and throws, surrounded by favourable weather and flat, peaceful landscape. I sense a woman’s touch: a loving queenstanding just out of picture whispering words of encouragement and love. He also has a family (of children or pets): a background to come home to and be recharged by.

• So which card do we, you choose?
Which King do you/we root for?
Which ruler speaks with the most clarity?

I know my answer; I have known it all along, for when drawing the cards I drew first from one pack and then the other, reaching in only to find the matching King. And from the first deck I didn’t so much draw as have it delivered, the King flying out and landing on the table in front of me. The Rider Waite is rather like that: clear, concise, no hanging around.

Looking deeper… this King is a proud man. He is also competent and used to taking care of himself. He was brought up this way, abandoned by parents who had other commitments, other concerns, and who were themselves raised likewise. Clever, wise, intellectual, he sees the world with clear eyes, unclouded by fantasy. He would love to indulge in things like angels and spirits but his life doesn’t afford him that luxury. He believes in God and is a humble and obedient servant to the words and advice he regularly receives, but that is as far as his journey goes. Some would call him pious, but again this is just how he was reared. He is not really forging his own path: he is following where the one given him goes and this is why he is often unhappy.

He sits upon an inherited seat. He is the oldest son amongst other children; this was his destiny from birth, he couldn’t have avoided or escaped it if he wanted to. And to begin with, he was happy enough. But now, years later – battles, decisions, arguments, disputes, wins, losses, uprisings, unrest, riches, poverty, sickness, health… all far too familiar: he is tired and no longer content. As the lives taken mount up; as the sickness and pain around him escalates and grows; as the world changes and his ability to affect it diminishes, shrinking and shrinking: he feels increasingly suffocated and desperate to break free. If he could, he would throw down his crown, let his sword fall to the floor and rise up and run naked until he could no longer feel or see his kingdom. Then he would take a plane and a boat, and find a quiet island where he could live out the rest of his days in quiet contemplation, unaware of the nature or disparity of external events. But he can’t, or doesn’t feel that this would be right: responsibility traps him; he has others to think of; he is not his own man.

So why is this King here and what does he have to tell us?

First, ask yourself who he is:

• Is he you?
• Is he someone else in your life?
• Is he a situation?
• Is he something you have?
• Or something you need?

Look to his strengths and his qualities. Do they resonate with you or do you find yourself, or who or whatever he stands for, lacking?

*

Let’s unpick the image to understand why:

sword
   – plain
   – simple
   – no frills
crown
   – gold
   – RWS * heavy, large
   – SC ** light, padded, adorned with velvet
butterfly
   – stuck to the throne
   – pointing upward
birds
   – two
   – overhead
   – far away
clouds
   – RWS * dark, ominous, close, low
   – SC ** white, fluffy, distant, high
landscape
   – RWS * sparse, dry, red/yellow, sickly looking
   – SC ** flat, lush, green, thick
pillow/soil (depending on the deck)
   – grounding
   – connection with the land
   – symbolic of bloodshed?
throne
   – stone
   – simple
   – elegantly carved
   – seat of God
clothing
   – many-layered
   – richly coloured
   – expensive
   – restrictive
   – uniform

  * RWS: Rider Waite Smith
** SC: Sharman-Caselli

A sword is a powerful weapon. It is also a tool. And it is very personal, functioning almost as an extention of the body. The wrong sword – be it too thick, thin, light or heavy: and the wielder experiences impairment to his ability to fight. Think about new shoes that don’t quite fit: heels aching, toes rubbing, limping and slow. This is what a sword is like, only the consequences are more severe. The king’s sword – plain, simple, no frills – shows a man who takes fighting seriously with little concern for trappings and wealth. The sword is of the highest quality. It is clean, sharp and polished. It functions well. And while some may like to add gold and gems and intricate carvings… there is no actual need and the king, realising this, feels unpressurized to do so as a result. This is important to him, because while he got to choose his sword, his crown and robes were chosen for him, most likely handed down.

For this reason, regarding our analysis, his crown and clothing hold little concern. They do not speak to the true depth of the man or address the intricate layers of his soul. They do not tell us what we need to know. And the fact that there is such a disparity of colour – with the RWS being blue/green and brown/red and the SC purple and indigo – only makes it more confusing. One speaks of a man who is overly serious, someone who has allowed himself to become trapped in a role that does not suit him, who is deeply unhappy, who continues on because he believes it is the right thing to do for his kingdom and his country. And the other a person who is relatively happy; secure on his path, certain of why he is here and what he would like to achieve. This man is deeply connected: to the land, the kingdom, his people and family. His clothing and crown suggest the church is very important to him, as is spirituality. And I believe he feels called to his role as ruler and accepts it willingly.

Returning, therefore, to the RWS; disecting it further for its story, its truth; looking at the whole picture and not just the seperate details: this card is telling us that the King is a strong and just man who speaks his own mind with confidence, unshy about sharing his truth. He is learned and has a quick mind, having spent many years in study. Education and knowledge are important to him. He studies still, whenever he has the time: soaking up information like a sponge, adjusting his angle amd view to suit; acccommodating, moderating, evolving. This has taught him to be fair and just. He hates to hurt but will do so when necessary. He is certain of his beliefs and opinions and is not easily swayed. He is, or would like to be, very spiritual, and will be genuinely one day when he has time. He knows that the world is much bigger than him – he is just a pawn, a simple man on a personal journey – and he would like to do his best to earn his passage, so to speak.

But alas, he is trapped: within a role, by expectation, by the ‘he’ he has been and the ‘he’ those around him therefore perceive him to still be. He is burdened too, with guilt and remorse. He would like to go back and change certain things, do them better, different, not at all; try out different alternatives.

*

SUMMARY:

The King of Swords calls our attention to how we are ruling our life and asks:

• Are we balanced and just?
• Are we compassionate and kind?
• Are we grounded and reasonable?
• Are we rational and mature?

At the same time, it also encourages us to look deeper:

• Are we spiritually connected?
• Do we have a regular spiritual practice?
• Are we respected, sought out, turned to, honoured and obeyed?
• Are we stimulated intellectually?
• Do we have the freedom to come and go from our seat and our role,
   or is it, and the expectations we and others place upon it, restricting us and
   keeping us from being happy?

Next, ask yourself who this King is:

You?
Another person?
• A situation?

If he’s you: add more of what he is lacking; softening or hardening him as you see fit.

• Maybe you need to listen before you take action and speak more gently?
• Maybe you take too long to say you piece and let others walk all over you or
   take the lead?
• Maybe you are living in the past, believing that this is the only choice available,
   when really, fully grown, you have the power to make up your own mind?

If he’s another person, is he:

• Someone you already know?
• Someone you would benefit from having in your life?
• Someone you would like to meet or leave behind?

Work out who he is and then you will be able to figure out what the card is telling you and the best course of action to take.

*

CONCLUSION:

Right now this card is a message to reassess and reconstruct your life, to look at how things are weighted and get rid of that which does not serve you.

Look at all of the ingredients. Ask what makes you happy and what makes you sad. Examine what you need more of and move towards that. Walk away from what is old, outmoded, detrimental and bad. If it dulls your energy, if it diminishes your light: you aren’t treating yourself with enough love and respect. If it makes you sparkle and brings out your inner geanie: embrace it.

Pulled September 1st, 2016: this card is all about the surrounding energy, the new moon and Mercury retrograde. The new moon is a time of awakening: we are leaving the darkness ushered in by the arrival and departure of the full moon and travelling back towards the light; each night the small slither grows, delicate fingernail swelling into ripe fruit. For us this symbolises re-entry, emergence, rebirth, reinvention, restoration, inspiration, creativity and growth. It is a time to make plans, to start things, to begin again.

And yet this energy is juxtaposed by Mercury retrograde and the widely-held belief/superstician that surrounds it; for in Mercury retrograde we are supposed to keep it simple and small. To avoid making a big decision, entering into or leaving a relationship, signing a contract, moving house, using electrical equipment, driving a vehicle, speaking in public, taking an exam, etc. A fair few exceptions, and there are doubtless more…

So what are we supposed to do when one energy says YES and the other warns NO: freeze like a rabbit in headlights? No, we look to the cards and we reinterpret the cards from here.

Perhaps the King is actually Mercury in retrograde, ruling with an iron rod and firm hand; and we are simply his people: bound, whether we like it or not, to his will? Perhaps, too, because of the surrounding energy and the energy of the card, we are stuck beneath a steely woman or man? Is our boss a tyrant, partner a pig, best-friend selfish, father violent, mother hard? Are we supported or silenced?

The card is calling upon us to go inside, to take this period – lasting roughly until the 22nd – as an opportunity to reassess. What do we need to get rid of, let go of, lose? What do we need to balance, moderate, reduce, elevate? If our own energy is out of whack, we should take responsibility for this and focus on inviting more masculine or feminine energy in, softening and hardening as necessary. This is the key and the ultimate message.

~

HOMEWORK:

To get the most from this reading, you also need to do the homework. Work your way through the list of below, observing what surfaces:

• Answer all of the questions in the article
• Take note of your insights, deductions and evaluations
• Become your own mentor or spiritual consultant:
   – or find someone who can
Empty out all that no longer serves you
• Figure out what will
• State and repeat your intention to allow and invite more of this into your life

You have read this article and found these cards today because they are meant to guide you. Honour yourself with the permission and freedom to really appreciate that.

~

If this article has stirred things up for you or made you realise there are things in your life you would like to resolve, please feel free to visit my contact page or email me me to discuss both these things and the possibility of our working together in the future to accomplish these things.

Or, to book an appointment directly, see my contact page.

image

To be healed is having an awareness that you were never broken

To keep up to date with my progress and receive love and light in your inbox, send me your email address.

• Ask me a question or book an appointment
Buy remedies, healing aides and helpful accessories
• Check out my Etsy shop Lemon Rose Petals 🍋 to see what else I do

Baa Baa, Black Sheep

image
Things keep breaking inside my house
and I seem to spend every spare moment fixing them.

I seek comfort in a warm cup,
my bed, and the gentle rhythm
of two needles going clickety clack.

Slowly nothing becomes substance
until eventually a blanket appears.

by Rebecca L. Atherton

image

To be healed is having an awareness that you were never broken

To keep up to date with my progress and receive love and light in your inbox, send me your email address.

Ask me a question or book an appointment
Buy remedies, healing aides and helpful accessories
• Check out my Etsy Shop to see what else I do

Green and Gold

I have nearly completed my Christmas tree and I’m so proud, waxing about her as if she were a newborn child. Given the brevity of time before me and the new terrain, the landscape of ‘different’ in which to source from, she’s a work of art. A patchwork of randomly sourced objects, lovingly put together with an attention to detail and adherence to certain rules – like each additional adornment must be serviceable all year, for life not just for December…, she presents a whole that even I with my obsessive need for perfection cannot readily unpick.

There is a velour cat with a bubblegum pink ribbon; a perspex diamond accommodating two mis-adventuring mice (one, with her purple jacket and hat, reminding me of my grandma) a child petting her pet, who just so happens to be a beautiful chocolate-brown spaniel; a hippo in a tutu attempting a pirouette; a moose holding a snow-clad tree – tiny in comparison to his rotund self; an eccentric giraffe displaying, in his outstretched hand, an umbrella (perhaps to remind me of England and all of the rain I incurred there); a felted tiger straight out of ‘Where the Wild Things are’, a similar felted fox and kangaroo, part of a matching collection; a terracotta angel painted Mallorcan style; a ceramic squirrel with a hollow centre and a rabbit carved from local wood. All that’s missing is the star.

Sitting at the very top, visible from every angle… the star cannot just ‘do’, she has to outshine. So while I’ve seen passable solutions and the occasional ‘blow me away with their beauty but also with their price’ attempts at twinkling joviality, I haven’t yet seen anything that works without breaking the budget (which is also one of the rules!) apart. But I believe… : in the solution, in the ‘right’ one, in the five-pointed declaration that is made specifically for me. When the Universe is ready (as like with everything else), she will extend her palm and yield. And if for some unforeseen reason she will not explain, she, the universe and all of the powers that accompany her… deem I am not to have a talisman, a gem to shine in the night, to ward off the darkness… then so be it. There are reasons greater than me.

And maybe it’s about being flexible in the face of restriction. Or happy amongst the uncompromising walls of limitation. Or about only seeing what you want to see.

Living from the one hastily-packed suitcase, a sitting room full of boxes it would be unwise to unpack; making do with another’s curious ornaments and furniture – a glass bowl full of plastic fruit, a black sofa with rose embellished cushions, threadbare rugs that house more beach than dust, a table and chairs with green velvet seats (seriously?), a kitchen that supports the making of tea but actively dissuades the creation of anything else, appliances that make their grievances known, usually throughout the night; bedsheets that itch and towels that scratch, tiles that bear the mark of generations and shift beneath passing feet: there is a lot of accepting and reimagining involved.

But like with boxes and randomly placed objects; unfolded clothes, decaying flowers and unwashed cups: all manner of unwanted but immovable things… After a while they cease to exist, the eye cleverly distorting what the mind lacks the conscious desire and active need to see.

imageSo really it’s just my tree that stands out, projecting beauty, colour, positive energy, fun, enchantment, love and pride. Greeting my return like a faithful friend, she adds a little warmth and welcome to an otherwise cold and inanimate space.

To be healed is having an awareness that you were never broken

To keep up to date with my progress and receive love and light in your inbox, send me your email address.

Ask me a question or book an appointment
Buy remedies, healing aides and helpful accessories
• Check out my Etsy Shop to see what else I do

Everything is perfect

image

If the Universe could talk and if you could listen, he – she, it, the Universe – would tell you this:

“Love yourself. Forgive yourself. Give yourself a break. You are wonderful, both inside and out. You are doing so well and you are being so brave and I am honoured to be party to your journey and to be a part of what makes you unique.

Please stop worrying so much. And please, stop being so fearful. Nothing will hurt you more than you already hurt yourself.

Everything happens for a reason: it is there to guide and teach. Even heartbreak. Even hardship. Even difficulty and pain.”

“For without challenge we cannot grow. And without adversity we seldom heal. And neither do we choose to embrace the true path, the path of our destiny, the path that is our right.”

What got you here: to this page, to this blog, to this random space out of all of the numerous other random spaces on the Internet? What led you to click ‘HELLO’ when you could just as easily passed on by?

And then what led you to read when you could equally have gone: ‘NEXT’, ‘BORED NOW’or ‘TOO TIRED’… What led you to surrender? Don’t just continue… Think about it. Take a ‘time out’ to really consider it. Give that gift to yourself. Because there are no random encounters and everything happens for a reason. So if you are here, you are supposed to be here and there is something in these pages for the finding.

Maybe it’s a word? Maybe it’s a picture? Maybe it’s a piece of information about something you had forgotten or something you haven’t found out about yet? Whatever it is. And however you find it… There will be something just for you. Find it. Take it. Embrace it.

Because the Universe wants you to know that

“Everything happens for a reason,” and “right now is all there is.”

Forget about the past. It does not exist, except in your memory. Drop it and stop worrying about how you’re going to get through tomorrow.

Forget about the future. It hasn’t arrived yet. And worrying about it or attempting to manipulate it won’t help it accommodate you.

Live for right now. Live for the moment. It’s all you have. Pay attention to it and to the gifts that it offers and all will be well.

Surrender yourself instead of fighting. Embrace spontaneity, happenstance, chance and change. Allow life to step in and steer the journey.

Stop hurting. Stop avoiding. Stop hating and punishing, both other’s and yourself. Stop seeing life as a burden, yourself as a victim, situations and circumstances as things that happen to you.

Trust. Believe. Know. Everything is perfect. Everything is correct. Everything is exactly how it should actually be.

Absorb the present moment with gratefulness and wonder.

Say ‘YES’ instead of ‘NO’.

Explore. Investigate. Accept. Do.

Live with enthusiasm. Connect with sincerity. Move with confidence and passion.

Know that you are watched. Know that you are treasured. Know that you are loved.

image

To be healed is having an awareness that you were never broken

To keep up to date with my progress and receive love and light in your inbox, send me your email address.

Ask me a question or book an appointment
Buy remedies, healing aides and helpful accessories
• Check out my Etsy Shop to see what else I do

Sweet Surrender

image
The flower opens to receive a friend.

Satisfying an inner thirst,
the empty becomes complete.

by Rebecca L. Atherton

To be healed is having an awareness that you were never broken

To keep up to date with my progress and receive love and light in your inbox, send me your email address.

Ask me a question or book an appointment
Buy remedies, healing aides and helpful accessories
• Check out my Etsy Shop to see what else I do

Growing from the centre

image

Growing from the centre, spreading out; opening tired arms, reaching out… I begin to evolve; returning – slowly, surely, bit by timid bit – to my maker, to the one who conceived the thought and (albeit thousands of years ago), made my forebears who then lead lives that in a very protracted ‘meandering-around-the-fields kind of way (a bit like my writing) eventually led to me.

But who is that voice that’s calling? And why now? Why not before, when I first had need of it? 

Was it necessary to be so beaten, so tattered and torn, so tangled and tormented, bereft? Did I need to lose it all before I could from the ground, the grey grit of the tired bedraggled pavement, start crawling back?

~

Praying, meditating, practicing yoga; spending quiet time, alone time, time with me: I pick up the pieces, attempting to reassemble the puzzle that – whole, complete – amounts to an entirety of something I am only now coming to know.

I try to remember that God loves me and that Jesus died for my sins. I try to remember too that other people have suffered, suffer, are suffering still, and that we are all battling similar things.

Only it’s easy to forget and then feel miserable, or perhaps act out, speaking from the lonely part, the child that has since we began been neglected.

~

Reading self-help books; studying religion, spirituality, philosophy, metaphysics… I move, crossing a landscape of boulders that was ‘once upon a time long ago’ green and vibrant.

Planting seeds; tending to the garden, praying to the moon and dancing for the sun: colour arrives and I thrive, rising up from the ashes of pain and shame to walk with grace and confidence.

And I try to have fun and to remember how to play, taking advice from children and the tiny inside me, the ‘me’ that I am only now really learning to see and accept. Fimo unicorns dance across tabletops, origami doves gather around lamps, felttip rainbows remind me to be kind to myself when all around me I’m staring at clouds. Having allowed what has been forbidden to surface, it won’t now be shut back down.

I was afraid that perhaps I wasn’t being mature enough.

I was also afraid that I had gone mad, losing my soul down a rabbit hole that, once entered, did not permit one to turn back.

Now I see that the answer is simple, that I have instead been forced to rewind, returning to parts that never grew, reconnecting with parts that were rejected.

Listening to her, seeing her, for the first time; looking with complete awareness, judgement-free: I slowly heal what was allowed to self-destruct. It is painful and slow. Strange how this journey began as one thing, as a new career path, as an evolution of ego – albeit with a good heart – and then turned into something else entirely that has, in new and nefarious ways, challenged me.

~

Walking in the light, I see that God had other plans and that, really, when it’s all peeled back, there is only ever one path, one way, and it is love.

Love makes us happy.

Love brings us peace.

Love enables us to forgive and thereby to finally heal.

Love enables us to reach out and touch and begin to restore, transforming hate and anger, cynicism and judgement, depression and pain. Little by little, the world begins to change. 

It is a journey of a thousand miles. And, like all of you, each day I take another step.

by Rebecca L. Atherton
image

To be healed is having an awareness that you were never broken

To keep up to date with my progress and receive love and light in your inbox, send me your email address.

Ask me a question or book an appointment
Buy remedies, healing aides and helpful accessories
• Check out my Etsy Shop to see what else I do

So lovely. So true. So freaking difficult!


If you are struggling to see past the red crosses you have drawn all over yourself and self-love is this mysterious thing other people seem able to adopt and then apply but which you (no matter how hard you try – and you really do try hard) just can’t seem to be able to implement…

Forgive yourself.

It’s not something that happens overnight.

Neither is it something that comes from a place of punishment and guilt. So…

Stop beating yourself up.

And stop judging your insides against the outsides of others. Their insides are mixed up too. And most of them have issues with their outsides, no matter what you in your ‘not knowing’, in your ‘separateness’ from them, perceive. They’re only together, ‘fixed’, ‘sussed’, on the right spiritual/life path… because you, in your ignorance of their authentic truth, their blueprint reality, are attributing that quality to them. You’ve literally shone a halo over their head. And it’s beautiful and it’s bright. But in their mind’s eye (and that’s the eye that’s important), it’s not there, it’s not even remotely visible. In fact, if you were to ask them and find them willing to share, they would tell you that actually they’re scared, they’re stressed; they’re angry, depressed, sick, aching, damaged, battered and bruised. Because viewed in that light, none of us escape unscathed.

But who says injury is a bad thing?

And why does an outbreak of eczema or acne, a large birthmark, a scar, a burn, etc., make us any the less beautiful, any the less acceptable to the world?

And do we have to wear make-up; have clean, styled, freshly-washed hair, don tight bodies and fashionable clothes, in order to be deemed worthy to ourselves and our colleagues, our friends and family? No, it’s ridiculous.
Animals love themselves exactly as they are. They don’t even question it.

Babies and children too.

Watch a child. See how they treat themselves, the love they demonstrate.

They don’t see faults, flaws. They don’t look in the mirror and grimace, turn from their reflection when passing shop windows, apologise hundreds of times each day for their behaviour, their lack.

When they are in pain, they demand immediate attention.

And when they play, there’s no “you go first” or “it’s ok you hurt me… I don’t mind”. They protest. They stand up for their rights. They know who is supposed to come first and they make sure that in every given moment, encountered situation, received experience, that that person does.
Now, I’m not suggesting that we all start acting like two-year-olds or that we forget about kindness to others and consideration and care. These are important too.

What I’m saying is that somewhere in the process of growing up, we sort of lost ourselves and forgot that we need to be treated with respect. And that that respect ought to come from inside first before we even attempt to find it outside of ourselves. Because outside is, essentially, external, separate; subject to mood, location, season and whim. We need to have a firm, stable centre; foundations to draw from, to act from, to sit upon… before we start collecting people and things, adding them to what lights us up.
Acceptance and compassion (i.e. self-love) are all about learning to hold the space and to embrace yourself exactly as you are in any given moment or situation. Yes, that means loving the lesser as much as the better hair days. And treating the belly aches, back aches, headaches, foot aches, arm aches, breaks and sprains; psoriasis, eczema, acne, dry patches, wrinkles, shadows, creases and lines, and all of the other various nefarious illnesses, ailments, injuries and perceived misdemeanours – that, irritatingly (although I won’t judge), seem to multiply over the years – with care. By this, I mean tuning into the body-part or area in which we are experiencing discomfort: feeling it, seeing it, sensing it from inside. And then attempting to commune with it, striking up a conversation, building a relationship.

• What does it look like?
• What does it sound like?
• What does it want to say?

Finding out as much as we can so that we can get to know it, not just as a part of ourselves, but as a part in its own right.

For example: a spot might be telling us numerous things. That we are allergic to something in our diet or environment. That we need a good night’s sleep. That we would benefit from more exercise. That we are unhappy in our relationship. That we are stressed at work, etc.

And what about neck pain? What are we refusing to see? What won’t we turn and look at – thereby avoiding and, knowingly or unknowingly, allowing to dominate our lives…?

Every perceived problem is actually a communication, a message from our bodies, begging us to slow down, go inside, stop and listen.

And by learning to listen, we not only develop a much better relationship to ourselves; we improve all of our other relationships too. Our relationship to our life. Our relationship to the people around us. Our relationship to our job…
So, next time you’re beating yourself up:

• take a moment to stop and listen
• find a quiet space
• close your eyes
• put on some relaxing music
• hold where it hurts

– or where you think it (the discomfort, the thing you are ‘right-now’ hating, resisting in the moment; the thing that is perceived as a burden) is coming from.

• sense it
• see it
• feel it
• listen

And as you are listening, ask not “why are you doing this to me?” but “why are you doing this for me?”, “what do you have to say?”. And know that the answer is important, no matter what it is.

Because the truth is that:

Your insides can’t lie to you like your outside can.

Be brave. Be strong. Be reliable.

Instead of rejecting yourself, show up.

And when you do, be accepting and compassionate. Treat yourself as you would treat a plant or a small child. Get to know yourself all over again. And from that place plant many seeds that – with love and attention, with kindness and consideration – will grow.

Open. Unfold. Spread out and unpack. Expand, develop and communicate. Commence. Initiate. Set in motion. Set up. Raise the curtain and – when you are good and ready but not when you are too late, when you are in the here and now not in the goodbye – proudly step out to embrace and meet. 

by Rebecca L. Atherton

image

To be healed is having an awareness that you were never broken

To keep up to date with my progress and receive love and light in your inbox, send me your email address.

Ask me a question or book an appointment
Buy remedies, healing aides and helpful accessories
• Check out my Etsy Shop to see what else I do

I believe in fairies

image
It is said that every time you say ‘there’s no such thing as fairies’, a fairy dies. And so it’s not something I’ve ever done. But I’m not sure either if I’ve ever really believed, not since I was a child and believing in magical things was easy, just part of the course, as natural as walking and sleeping and breathing. In fact, back then, it would have been an effort not to believe, because I was a dreamy child and I have always had a vivid imagination.

But as I got older and my life turned outwards, things like fairies and Santa Claus and magic and miracles fell off. It happens to all of us. It’s part of growing up. A sad fact of life that only a few of us escape.

I continued to love fairies. Angels too, but in a distant, only half-aware kind of way. I might turn to my guardian angel every so often to help me to get past something, to heal me in ways where I was stuck. But I was more likely to turn to God and ask for his forgiveness and love.

Until recently, that is… when I woke up.

Since then, the magic has filtered into my life in delicate streams, small amounts that fit me ‘just right’; amounts that are knowing and gentle, respectful and kind. Some simply see, waking overnight, shutting their eyes to one world and opening them to another. I have slowly had the blindfold removed and I am still unveiling.

Today is one of those days when I experienced a shift, one of several large ones when something remarkable happened, something so impossible, so undeniable, so inexplicable otherwise, it could only be a miracle.

I have a bracelet that is very dear to me. It symbolises many things. And each time I wear it and look at it: I find peace and stability and reassurance and strength. It’s a talisman, each individual bead, each crystal, chosen for its reason and meaning, its inherent properties; its power further heightened by the symbols I’ve placed into it. So when I woke this morning and its absence was felt, I went into panic. How could this be? How could this happen? There was no logic. The clasp is secure. I wear it carefully, I don’t take it off. And yet… here it was: missing, no longer resident on my arm.

I scoured the apartment. I searched high and low. I turned out drawers and looked inside pillow cases and underneath beds. I was distraught. A new one wouldn’t hold half of the meaning or symbolism this one did. It wouldn’t have travelled nearly as far. It would be a replica and thereby impotent. The thought was distasteful to me. I’d rather be without than with alien, with fraud.

After an hour, I gave up: reality setting in. I was tired yesterday, out of sorts. I must have lost it while out shopping, the bags on my arm unclipping the clasp. I must have then not noticed it all afternoon and all evening. I must have slept not noticing it still. I was distracted, desensitised. And, anyway… it’s so much a part of me, I no longer feel it. It just is until it is not.

I concluded that it was gone, that someone had found and taken it, that a stranger had chanced upon an unexpected gift. I buried my head in distraction, surrendering myself to the process of grief.

But there was one thing I did that was different, that was unexpected and new. I went to my bookcase, I selected a book, I looked up lost objects and I called upon Chamuel and asked him to help me. For Chamuel is the archangel of finding lost objects and so, in my newly awakened state, referring to him was the next logical step. But I was doubtful. I’ve asked for feathers and coins as proof of existence before and come up short. In fact, I haven’t seen a feather in months. Maybe that’s a sign in itself? You see, there’s this resistance, this reluctance to bother something so mighty and powerful, so divine, with something as trivial as me. And asking for feathers and coins, just really isn’t my thing. I’d prefer to wait for the big one: helping a loved one, healing a bone, overcoming a really big block. But I have been wanting something more tangible, more solid than the flickers of light that appear just outside my vision and the inexplicable smells that suddenly appear, and the strange noises I hear in certain places and the visions that come unbidden and the things that I know with such surety, such clarity, they can only have come from elsewhere. So I asked. And then I let go and left it there, trusting to the Universe and the grace of things I cannot see but which I am increasingly aware of and gradually more certain.

And I was leaving it, accepting it and letting it, until I suddenly had this urge to go look out the window and check to see if last night’s rubbish was still there. Now this is central London and rubbish disappears fast. Dustmen come at least once a day. And if not dustmen, then other men looking for things that might hold worth. So the chances of my rubbish still being there a good 16 hours later were slim. I’d go as far as to say impossible. And yet, as I looked out the window: there it was, the bag that this morning, only hours earlier, had not been there. Because I had checked, just on the off chance, in the name of not leaving any stone unturned. As much as I had retraced my path to each shop and pavement. But I had come up empty as I had expected to.

It was a sign and one that had me racing down the stairs, washing-up glove in hand, to retrieve the now dirty bag from the opposite pavement, avoiding the looks, the feelings of shame, that picking up things that are dirty seems to attract.

I sat in the kitchen: eager, hopeful, somehow certain. And yet… as the bag grew empty and the amount of pieces that might be hiding it shrank, my faith shrank too. Maybe it was just another test? Another challenge? Because there have been many of those.

And then there is was, staring up at me from the bottom right corner: my beautiful bracelet; complete, whole, undamage, returned.

I won’t go into how I leapt about like a child, thanking Chamuel until my energy was spent. Or how I then picked up the phone, needing to share. I shall simply leave you with this… We are not alone. We are not abandoned. We are watched and cherished and guided and loved.

There are things out there I cannot explain. Things, even, I cannot see. But I have faith and I am learning to surrender, because the more I let go, the more I see.

If you are in need of guidance or holding, why not give the angels a chance? After all, the worst that could happen is nothing at all.

by Rebecca L. Atherton

image

To be healed is having an awareness that you were never broken

To keep up to date with my progress and receive love and light in your inbox, send me your email address.

Ask me a question or book an appointment
Buy remedies, healing aides and helpful accessories
• Check out my Etsy Shop to see what else I do