Why am I getting so upset? Dialing into triggers and the truth behind what they are really about. 🧯

Emotional triggers can be difficult to understand and even more to influence because they tend to be automatic, meaning they happen in the heat of the moment before we have a chance to see them coming or intervene.

For example:

When our boss admonishes us at work for something we have done incorrectly… we are cut to the core: the wound is visceral, and we might weep.

Equally, if a waitress is short with us, or a bus driver bemoans us for not having the correct change: we might freeze, losing our voice or else shrink inwards in shame.

These reactions are exaggerated. We are having a large response to a small event. On the physical plane, at least, the trauma is minor. In our minds, however, and energetically, it is immense. It has snatched us up and taken us hostage to an earlier time; an instance where we were treated in a way that didn’t feel safe. This could be being disciplined as a child in a setting where we were forced to be silent. Or the constant daily repetition of being told we aren’t good enough.

Emotional triggers are serious because they rob us of our composure and when we lose it, our foundations are weak. We are strong only when we are ourselves as a fully integrated adult, when we are calm and reserved and grounded in our sense of self and place.

We all have people and things that cause us to lose it. And sometimes we are more than justified in our response. Perhaps we need to stand up for ourselves and exert our boundaries, because if we don’t no one else will. Perhaps we are on the path of learning to treat ourselves with more respect and love. But perhaps, too, this response is harmful, filling us up with excess cortisol and adrenaline, causing our nervous system to go into overdrive.

With all things, there is a balance and getting it right is a skill that constantly needs to be tweaked. Nobody is perfect. Even after years of therapy, I still unravel when the circumstances are right. What we can all do though is learn to see more clearly and endeavour to be more conscious, because the clearer we see and the more conscious we are, the less likely we are to shape shift in the heat of the moment.

The King of Pentacles reveals how we want to experience the world and how we would like to be treated by others.

In this world: we are king. We own a sizeable kingdom, over which we have control. We have everything we need: its presence guaranteed. As such we are comfortable and secure. And we feel protected and provided for.

It’s kind of like how our inner child envisions our life. Or how we wish it was and are always working towards achieving. We get upset, therefore, when we are challenged (our actions, choices, opinions…) because anyone questioning us and our ability threatens the foundations. We do not have deep roots. Any sharp breeze or medium-strength gust could uproot us.

This card indicates that what we most strongly desire – home, sanctuary, love, status, financial security, etc., still eludes us. And suggests that attempting to hold onto what we have managed to accumulate: a property we rent, a job that’s unstable, a partner who we don’t like or who might leave us, etc…? is causing us conflict. In many ways, we feel like an imposter because we are trying to balance two things – what we want and what we have – and it is dividing us, and this is where the triggering occurs. The King of Pentacles reveals this and shows us that we need to make a choice. Do we play it safe and stay where we are, or do we opt for transformation and adventure?

And this is where the Two of Wands comes in. In this card we see a man holding two poles, grappling with a decision. Does he choose the left, representing staying put, or the right, representing action? This here is our trigger. We are unhappy with where we are in our lives. We are tired of all of the compromises. We want mastery and to be in control. We are old enough, surely, and wise enough. We have worked hard thus far. But we are like this man: a peasant standing guard over someone else’s kingdom.

This card is a call to action. Decide to stay put and choose to accept what you have now and where you are and put down all complaints against it, surrendering your free will. Or act, walking away from everything that you know and have built in order to start again.

The Four of Swords is how we move towards a revolution and how we lend support to our triggered parts. In this card we see a tomb inside a sarcophagus, inside of which, we presume, there is a man. This card is suggesting that we allow a part of us time to rest, laying him or her aside for a period. In this sealed and protected space, we can drift into sleep, away from anxiety, worry, fear, concern, drama and conflict. A part of us can take a break, going on an inner retreat. This part isn’t dead, only sleeping, and once he or she is done, rested and recovered, they can be returned to us and our world.

The King of Swords offers us an alternative to the King of Pentacles energy: a new throne, and suggests we work to own it. In this picture the wealth we possess is knowledge and the kingdom we have mastery over is truth. If we can understand that our learning and what we choose to do with it is our power, far more than money ever will be, then we can have freedom from our triggers. Because no one can take the wealth of what we know and choose to believe away from us unless we permit it.

Are you ready to walk this path?

Are you brave enough to make some decisions?

This reading is a call to action, if ever there was one, but if you are here you are ready.

🧯

If you would like to know more about what is going on right now and would also like to hear more about my thoughts… I discuss the things that are coming up for me and how I am attempting to mother, manage, navigate and clear them in my own life on my YouTube channel in a section called A Little Light.

There are also lots of tarot card readings covering topical issues, as well as love, relationships, career, health and life, etc.

🧯

Have a browse, give me a thumbs up, subscribe and leave a comment if you have anything you would like to share, ask or add. 

Thank you for reading and have a brave and beautiful day. x

What is the energetic cause of this lump in my throat? 🧣

Most of us have experienced discomfort in our throat at some point in our lives, whether as a result of swollen glands, a viral infection, an injury or an emotional response to external circumstances. And, perhaps, at these times, we have been more aware of what that impediment meant in relation to our voice and our airway and the importance of that channel within us.

As a rule, we don’t tend to question our voice and the ease with which we can communicate until something interferes with it. We simply take it for granted, not giving our airway – and breathing and staying alive as a result of that oxygen – much thought or energy until something threatens it.

In this reading I address what might be the energetic cause of your throat complaint, i.e. what external event or circumstance is contributing to it; for what is physical always has these emotional components attached.

In this reading, the Hierophant speaks of something that is stuck and which has become too strict and rigid. The image in the card is cold, austere and the man is unsmiling. He rules from a position of power with the church at his back. The men at his feet are his acolytes, they do not dare question him. At first glance, the two grey columns stand out, reminding me immediately of a throat. The Hierophant then presents as a block in this airway; so he is what is stuck and causing the lump.

Are you being dictated to or dominated?
Are there voices in your present or carried forward from you past that are silencing or controlling you?

This card suggests that something that is hiding under the guise of moral rightness is the cause of your ‘lump’. Perhaps that is the medical system if you have tried to find answers via doctors. Perhaps it is the doctrines of society if you have tried to shift, change, challenge or grow at work. Perhaps it is your cultural roots if you were raised within a certain a belief system or under a specific religious canopy. Figure out what might be obstructing you from not only speaking your truth but also living it.

If you are already using your voice to stand up for yourself, what about the voices inside? How do they speak to you and how much of what they say do you believe and take to heart? Something needs to be loosened and set free. There is too much rigidity and stricture. Try something different. Think outside the box. Be a little more eccentric.

 

The Three of Swords shows us how to remove this lump and how to heal it. The answer is in the wounds that we carry in our heart. For just as the card depicts a heart punctured by three separate steel swords: so our own heart has been stabbed by events and individuals. Healing, therefore, comes from a thorough examination of story and self and work on addressing and releasing the trauma.

Who do we need to forgive?
What chapters in our narrative do we need to return to in order to rewrite? 
Where has our own opinion and our own beliefs been stoned and silenced?

Your throat may hurt but it is your heart that needs the healing and perhaps your throat is only blocked in response to trying to stem, silence and still that grief and that work.

🧣

If you would like to know more about what is going on right now and would also like to hear more about my thoughts… I discuss the things that are coming up for me and how I am attempting to mother, manage, navigate and clear them in my own life on my YouTube channel in a section called A Little Light.

There are also lots of tarot card readings covering topical issues, as well as love, relationships, career, health and life, etc.

🧣

Have a browse, give me a thumbs up, subscribe and leave a comment if you have anything you would like to share, ask or add.

Thank you for reading and have a brave and beautiful day. x

When will I meet my soulmate? 💍

One of the most common questions I’m asked, and people in readings ask in general, is: “when will I meet my soulmate?”.

The next is: “is he/she my soulmate?”.

From the minute we are born, we are all searching for love. More than anything else in this world, it is what we want the most. To be seen, to be heard, to be respected and held: these things are powerful. With the ‘right’ love, we get to experience them – and, in doing so, continue to evolve and grow in a way that is both comfortable and meaningful. In the embrace of the ‘right’ love, we get to be our best selves, whilst living in and being supported in a nurturing and encouraging environment. With the right love we develop confidence and curiosity and we cultivate interest and adventure. With the right love our hearts remain whole even when they get broken. It protects us, sustains us; we are stronger.

But finding that ‘right’ love, that ‘perfect’ match, that person who truly gets and respects us, is the difficult part and, sadly for most of us, not our reality. Rather, we journey through relationships suffering all kinds of hurts, subjected to multiple infractions and indignities; sometimes wounded, sometimes broken and pulled apart; sometimes beaten, sometimes violated and raped. And yet, somehow, despite it all, perhaps in spite of such hardship, we continue: never giving up; constantly hoping, always trying to do better and get more.

How can we help to speed the process up and get to our soulmate faster? How can we avoid all this pain? 

The Lovers card portrays a beauty contest where Paris, the Trojan prince, has to choose between three goddesses:

1. Hera, the wife of Zeus, offering him a place in the world and a home upon its surface. She has created a position of power and authority and is queen of it.

2. Aphrodite, the goddess of love, promising sex and intimacy. She can walk naked without shame and seduce men without guilt. She is both is love with and at home within herself.

3. Athena, the goddess of wisdom, proffering loyalty and support, ready to fight for the things she truly believes in. She has strength and stamina and the courage to do what is right.

They stand there on the grass, as if on a stage – presenting their gifts, permitting themselves to be judged.

Do you know these women?

Are they in you?

How well are you acquainted?

Are they balanced and of equal strength?

This card is all about decisions and choices and when it comes to finding your soulmate and making a connection with them, you need to honour and balance all of your parts. Work on balancing your inner gods and goddesses and getting yourself ready for your soulmate. You will attract the right mate, the person you are destined to be with, when the healing work inside yourself has been more thoroughly explored. And remember, too, that if you have to stand on a platform and be judged, if you are selected only for your assets – you castle, appearance or fighting power… the ‘he’ or ‘she’ who selects you is not your true mate.

The Temperance card depicts Iris, goddess of the rainbow. She represents balance – between night and day, the sun and the moon, masculine and feminine, and the conscious and unconscious. In Greek mythology, she is also known as a messenger, carrying messages between heaven, earth and hell. And in some myths… she is known, too, for giving birth to Eros, the god of love. Here she reinforces the message of the Lovers card: balance yourself equally, embody and embrace all of your parts, strengthen where you are weak and temper where you are overly strong, stitch yourself back together, piece by piece, in a way that more accurately represents who you were before life interfered and began unpicking you. As Iris does, step into the river of healing and allow your to inner waters to flow, releasing all of the trauma and pain you have collected inside and stored. Measure out what you would like to release, cup by cup, while always ensuring one foot is firmly planted on the life-giving belly of the earth.


The Ace of Swords shows us Athena once again, echoing the Lovers card, encouraging us to really step into and embody and embrace this part inside of of ourselves.

How do we feel about her?

How often is she active?

Is her presence a light or a dark one?

Once we have done the integration work of the previous two cards, along with the necessary balancing and healing, we are in a position to safely step into ourselves as Athena, moving forwards into our proper and rightful future in order to claim what we want. This card tells us that we will be ready, that this future is out there. But first we have to climb some steep mountains and pass beneath some moody skies, and there might be a few obstacles ahead of us too… As the Lovers card asks us to decide, so here there are decisions to be made. What do you need to cut loose; who… in order to realise the life and the circumstances for which you were truly intended?

 

💍

If you would like to know more about what is going on right now and would also like to hear more about my thoughts… I discuss the things that are coming up for me and how I am attempting to mother, manage, navigate and clear them in my own life on my YouTube channel in a section called A Little Light.

There are also lots of tarot card readings covering topical issues, as well as love, relationships, career, health and life, etc.

💍

Have a browse, give me a thumbs up, subscribe and leave a comment if you have anything you would like to share, ask or add.

Thank you for reading and have a brave and beautiful day. x

How can I find more joy?🥛🥛

In a world full of bad news and hardship, where at every turn and click unhappiness is projected outwards, it can be hard (even for the most fortunate) to remain untouched. For those who are experiencing their own dramas; who have suffered rejection, abandonment, betrayal and loss… finding and holding onto that joy can be that much more difficult.

This reading is intended to give you a broader perspective, along with gentle guidance, on how you can better manage and walk your life path.

The Queen of Swords 🗡 encourages you to sit proudly upon your throne, the mistress of your queendom. There has been hardship, difficulty and loss and, at that, there has been (and still is) pain. This has stretched you and grown you and strengthened your resolve. It has given you your wisdom and access to your inner truth and outer voice (even if you haven’t found ways to honour and express it yet). Pay attention in this hour of searching and questioning to practices that can help ground you. Focus on your feet and your foundations. Work to really anchor your roots. Plant, not just your feet, but your legs, spine, throat, neck and head also. Your voice is your super power, a channel for expressing the very essence of you, but your feet are your roots and it is from them that the food, energy and life force you need to think, act and do is delivered. Create a strong channel. Knowing and owning your truth, honouring and feeding it, is the surest way to reunite with your joy.

The Five of Cups 🏆 I nvites you to take the road less travelled, to leave behind that which you once held dear but which has ceased to support you. It has cast you out anyway, so you might as well stop lingering on its threshold, eternally lamenting over things past, and instead turn towards the future and walk away. Your coveting the past, hoarding it’s memories in the hope that with time and focus you can bring them back, is like a dark-cloud cloak completely enshrouding you, and the sun, despite its valour and strength, struggles to get beneath it. Focus not on the three overturned cups, the opportunities, relationships and things that you have lost, but on the two remaining cups, the cups that are full. Express gratitude. Nourish and nurture them. Spend time honouring them daily. Then pick the empty cups up and (treating them like they are opportunities, brand new seeds that you can grow) work out how you would like to fill them.

🥛🥛

If you would like to know more about what is going on right now and would also like to hear more about my thoughts… I discuss the things that are coming up for me and how I am attempting to mother, manage, navigate and clear them in my own life on my YouTube channel in a section called A Little Light.

There are also lots of tarot card readings covering topical issues, as well as love, relationships, career, health and life, etc.

🥛🥛

Have a browse, give me a thumbs up, subscribe and leave a comment if you have anything you would like to share, ask or add.

Thank you for reading and have a brave and beautiful day. x

 

What would ….. (insert mentor of choice) have to say about this? 🧘🏽‍♂️

This past week, or perhaps these past recent weeks, I’ve been questioning things more deeply, really trying to dissect the current narrative.

What is the real truth?

Who can we trust?

How can we know what to believe when there is so much conflicting information?

This feeling, these questions, will not leave my mind. They both haunt and irritate me. I’m fed up with being afraid and I’m frustrated with being manipulated. I’d really like the doubt and the anxiety to go away. My brain and my psyche are tired of having so very much to process and having to sacrifice my happy dream space each night.

🧘🏽‍♂️

This short reading is aimed at getting answers from a higher power, because I keep circling the question and continuously asking: “What would X, Y, Z… have to say?”

Like what would my grandmother, who has passed, wish to impart?

What would Gandhi think and how would he advise us?

How about Nelson Mandela, Mother Teresa, the previous Pope, the last Dali Lama, or Sylvia Plath, even…?

I’d be curious? I think a pandemic might have pushed all of them close to the edge.

🧘🏽‍♂️

Here, in this space (nestled safely within the vessel of today), we can ask, honing the question to our exact query, to the precise thing that is bothering or perplexing us, picturing that ‘person’ in our minds… and allowing the cards to attempt their reply.

The Page of Swords is fairly certain when he tells us to hit the books, for there is a need for further study. The only way to know what to think and how to act, is to educate yourself generously. So… More information. A broader source-bank. A higher vantage point. For only when you can see clearly can you attempt a rounded reply.

The Knight of Swords then stirs the pot, offering up the challenge to take it forwards, making that information, that truth, your grail. Like Jesus, Gandhi, Mandela, etc., take your word to the people. Make it known. Get it seen. Have it heard. Bring light and comfort to the meek by removing the web of lies.

And if that’s all a bit too much… well, at least you have a starting point and something to work towards and the freedom to temper it into whatever shape or form you want to fit your life.

🧘🏽‍♂️

If you would like to know more about what is going on right now and would also like to hear more about my thoughts… I discuss the things that are coming up for me and how I am attempting to mother, manage, navigate and clear them in my own life on my YouTube channel in a section called A Little Light.

There are also lots of tarot card readings covering the pandemic, as well as love, relationships, career, health and life, etc.

🧘🏽‍♂️

Have a browse, give me a thumbs up, subscribe and leave a comment if you have anything you would like to share, ask or add.

Thank you for reading and have a brave and beautiful day. x